Adult attachment theory is a tool for a better understanding of ourselves and others. Learning about ourselves and becoming more aware is a crucial first step in understanding how we typically respond to closeness, intimacy, and emotional needs in relationships. It is not a perfect tool, as we are complex beings, but it is a good start when it comes to relationships, both romantic and other. And we know that good, honest relationships are essential for our well-being and happiness. This is the second part of the attachment series. The first, available here, was an intro to this subject. In this post, I will discuss the importance of understanding attachment styles and cover each in detail. In the next, I will focus on the dynamics of different combinations of attachment styles.
While, for many, the holiday season is all about joy and happiness and (re)connecting, it brings anxiety and stress for some. This happens for many reasons, including spending time with friends and family we don't often see eye to eye. A spiritual teacher, Ram Dass, once said, 'If you think you're enlightened, go and spend the week with your family.' Still, the challenges are often opportunities to learn and change. Last year, I wrote about ‘navigating the holiday season using Buddhist principles’. This year, I will focus on a more contemporary type of wisdom offered by Social Psychology and the theory of perspective-taking.
Trauma seems to be a buzzword in yoga and wellness circles lately, with various modalities, from movement and breathwork to chanting and various ceremonies, advertised as trauma healing. However, can trauma be something we can move, breathe, sing or dance out? Of course, it is not that simple. When it comes to something as complex as trauma, there are no one-size-fits-all solutions. While a particular asana, breathing pattern, or any other practice or technique might be healing for one person, it can be triggering for another.
Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian practice of forgiveness and reconciliation. Itis like a mantra where you repeat the words ‘I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you’ as a form of mental and spiritual cleansing. By doing this practice, the ancient Hawaiian people believed it would clear the mind and it is wrong thinking and doing which is the root of all evil. Similar to many other cultures around the world.
I recently posted this photo my good friend and favourite photographer Sanjin took, as my private Facebook profile pix, and got an interesting comment about it in my inbox: "You're glowing; you must have finally found someone who makes you happy." It was a well-meant comment by a friend, but it did make me think. Yes, I am happy. I feel great in my skin, my heart is content, I'm healthy. And I guess it's true. For over a year now, I've been in a beautiful, magical, supportive and loving relationship with - myself. That special someone is me. Finally. But, as far as romantic relationships go, I am more single than ever.
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photography: Sanjin Kastelan / web design; Nina Vukas
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