Adult attachment theory is a tool for a better understanding of ourselves and others. Learning about ourselves and becoming more aware is a crucial first step in understanding how we typically respond to closeness, intimacy, and emotional needs in relationships. It is not a perfect tool, as we are complex beings, but it is a good start when it comes to relationships, both romantic and other. And we know that good, honest relationships are essential for our well-being and happiness. This is the second part of the attachment series. The first, available here, was an intro to this subject. In this post, I will discuss the importance of understanding attachment styles and cover each in detail. In the next, I will focus on the dynamics of different combinations of attachment styles.
While, for many, the holiday season is all about joy and happiness and (re)connecting, it brings anxiety and stress for some. This happens for many reasons, including spending time with friends and family we don't often see eye to eye. A spiritual teacher, Ram Dass, once said, 'If you think you're enlightened, go and spend the week with your family.' Still, the challenges are often opportunities to learn and change. Last year, I wrote about ‘navigating the holiday season using Buddhist principles’. This year, I will focus on a more contemporary type of wisdom offered by Social Psychology and the theory of perspective-taking.
Trauma seems to be a buzzword in yoga and wellness circles lately, with various modalities, from movement and breathwork to chanting and various ceremonies, advertised as trauma healing. However, can trauma be something we can move, breathe, sing or dance out? Of course, it is not that simple. When it comes to something as complex as trauma, there are no one-size-fits-all solutions. While a particular asana, breathing pattern, or any other practice or technique might be healing for one person, it can be triggering for another.
In the past month, I had one-on-one consultation sessions with my 300-hour YTTC graduates. Instead of having a long lecture about where to go from here for everyone, the idea was to discuss each unique situation. I believe it was helpful for them, but it also made me realise that most of us (yes, I include myself as this was me before) are reluctant to promote ourselves.
In just over two decades, since I have been witnessing the unfolding of Yoga in the West, the perception of Yoga and it’s practices have been changing and transforming quite fast. I say perception, because it is not up to us to decide what something which has been defined thousand of years ago is, but rather to see how it can expand, grow and evolve, taking into the account the age we live in and everything available to us today like science and information.
Only for a moment before reversing direction, the sun will stand still today. Solstice literally means sun (lat.sol) standing still (lat.sistere), inviting us to do the same; to stand still for a moment, to repose, reflect, reset. Because, only in these moments of stillness and calm we can see our true selves.
I wanted to write a blog about this for a long time now, but being a teacher trainer myself, I was always worried that some of my peers might take some things they don't agree with, personally. This is not my intention at all of course, and everything I will write here is just my opinion, nothing else. Some is based on my beliefs and some on my experience. But, as a yoga teacher, I feel my responsibility lies in serving the community, and that is my intention with this post. I hope it serves and helps some of you reading it.
Water is patient and always finds her way through the smallest cracks. It doesn’t anticipate or plan; it sees and flows through the opening. It doesn’t question; it trusts and follows. It teaches us that everything is intertwined, interconnected and co-dependent. There is nothing we can control but ourselves, how well we can adapt to external and internal circumstances and how much faith to find small openings and keep on flowing, trusting that life will show us the way, and how fearless we are in following our path non knowing where it may lead us.
A stray dog followed us a few days ago as we walked home from the beach. She seemed scared but decided to trust us and follow us home. We fed her and let her take shelter to rest and sleep on our terrace. She was restless at first and would startle at every louder sound, but after a while, she relaxed.
photography: Sanjin Kastelan / web design; Nina Vukas
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